Let Things Grow

I’m sitting yet again on a train, heading to one of my many somewheres; in this surprisingly comfortable seat by the window – and this time being spared the typical odd companion who comes and sits next to me with an enthusiastic chatting fever – I’ve got about an hour’s journey ahead and the chance to indulge in blog reading. I’ve done my homework: the posts are bookmarked and have little notes on them already – following the habit of reading one blogpost per trip (which means I read through three or four per day).

Inevitably the twitterverse intervenes, partly because I like to share what I’m reading and partly because I just can’t help checking what everyone else has been reading. If anyone checks my twitter feed, it might seem slightly weird – but I have been branded with that term since my teens, so that’s ok.

In a couple of those interventions, Zhenya (as she always manages) prompted the thought – and this post, subsequently – on favourite tools for professional and personal development. I promised a post and then took something like two months to write it. It happens. I doubt you don’t follow her blog, but just in case, DO follow WednesdaySeminars.

I think that answering a question on favourite tools is a difficult one. It can’t be one or two, you see, it’s multiples of multiples. While pondering over the several ways in which we move ourselves forward, it struck me that it has more to do with habits and attitudes than with single tools. In my case- and I know how challenging people who know me find this – everything evolves around questions. What’s this? How does it work? Can I do that? Why/Why not? Sometimes those whys and hows burden me too much, but to be fair, I’m not sure whether things would have developed well if I lacked that continuous sense of wonder. Sometimes it would be better to stop wondering. And look. And listen. Closely. Other times, it’s worth more to think than to listen or notice. Making the distinction between those is also a burden but thankfully, I have found other, similarly weird teachers who share my quests: a lovely, informal and hugely productive Reflective Practice group; a place to wonder, practice,then wonder some more, and all among people who allow for both activity and silence.

Silence is something great. I’m not sure how others perceive it, but for me it is necessary. As a bookworm, there is little that can interrupt my reading and silence also allows for easy breathing, thinking and writing – journaling I should say, because that’s what it is; a habit I’m happy and lucky to have developed and sustained. There is safety in a journal, which cannot compare to anything else, and what normally strikes me is how easily silence is achieved even in the most crowded of places, given the right circumstances.

The safe circles are all well and good, but we are not here just for ourselves and those close to us. A good practice, a worry, a simple thought, all need that added bit of magic: sharing. Sharing in any way we feel comfortable with. I’m not massively happy with social media generally, and blogging is actually something I do whenever I feel like it. The last few months, for example, only two or three posts appeared here and that’s because I was in a terrible mood and state and all my writing equally just oozed negativity. I didn’t press ‘publish’ and I’m glad I didn’t. It seemed better to channel energy to further studies, teacher development events with TesolGreece and other Associations, project ideas, working on my website and preparing proposals/presentations. 

I suppose the only tool it’s worth using as the basis of our development is ourselves. Do we know what we’re comfortable in? Do we have limits? Do we know when we’re most and least productive? Can we distinguish between what’s necessary and what’s only hype? Are we happy? Can we formulate habits that make us happy?

It is up to us, really. If I’ve learned anything so far, that is to make efforts, head forward and let things grow. And things do.

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2 comments on “Let Things Grow

  1. Marc says:

    Thanks for writing this. It’s horrible having ideas but neither the energy or will to write them down and see them through, so I am glad you got this done!

    • ChristinaC says:

      Thank you for reading and sharing this Marc.

      It’s not a good place to be in, that in-between stage; no matter how many things we would like to get done, life always happens and sometimes that doesn’t help.

      We do develop, however, in many different ways and for that reason I think we need to question our practices regularly and try to cultivate habits which help us stay in (or get back to) balance.

      I’m glad I got this done too and thank you for cheering me on!

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